A sense of mutual respect and collaboration are essential when negotiating with school districts on behalf of vulnerable children. First and foremost, it is important to approach any disputes with civility and calm. Recommendations from outpatient clinicians and evaluators should be thoughtfully written and all documentation should be provided to the school district in advance of any meetings. Surprises should be avoided at Team meetings; agendas should be clarified in advance; conversations and meetings should be followed up with notes of appreciation. This is typically impossible for parents to accomplish alone because every conversation about the suffering of one’s own child is painful and stressful, compromising any parent’s ability to think clearly or objectively about what to say, how to say it, when to say something and when to remain silent. These are the instincts that a skilled advocate can bring to the process.